And Something Good Happened, and Kat Saw That It Was Good, and She Did Bless It, Yea Verily

Phew.

Well, that is a relief.

It is my opinion, for the record, that pretty girls should have to answer their emails promptly, as otherwise unecessary pain is caused.

I felt like the guy in the T-Mobile commercial about dropped calls for a second there. "Baby? I am the only man in your life, right?"

But you know what? IT IS ALL OK. Why? BECAUSE SHERLOCK HOLMES IN THE 22ND CENTURY HAS MADE MY LIFE COMPLETE.



Watch and be amaaaazed.

Inspector G. Lestrade (whose first name I had always assumed was Gandalf) is now a woman, Holmes looks Aryan enough to be a member of Hitler Youth, and Watson is (WTF) a robot. And Moriarty has tragic sideburns. And looks like a monkey. And Jabez Wilson runs a fish and chips and virtual reality shop. And and and. OMG. It makes me so happy.

Like I said, it completes my life.

Best dialogue ever:

HitlerYouth!Holmes: I'll have fish and chips. In. . .Peking.

EvilCook: That's Beijing, dumbass.

Holmes: Oh, really? For how long?

I FIND THIS JOKE VERY FUNNY. DO NOT MOCK MY HISTORY NERDINESS OR I SHALL PWN YOU WITH MY KNOWLEDGE OF NINETEENTH CENTURY GAY SEXUAL PRACTICES.

Fear me.

Grrrr.

In case you can't tell, I am supremely bored.

The Guardian's List of 20 Geekiest Novels, With Ones Italicized That Kat Has, To Her Very Great Shame, Read

1. The HitchHiker's Guide to the Galaxy -- Douglas Adams
2. Nineteen Eighty-Four -- George Orwell
3. Brave New World -- Aldous Huxley
4. Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? -- Philip Dick
5. Neuromancer -- William Gibson
6. Dune -- Frank Herbert
7. I, Robot -- Isaac Asimov
8. Foundation -- Isaac Asimov
9. The Colour of Magic -- Terry Pratchett
10. Microserfs -- Douglas Coupland
11. Snow Crash -- Neal Stephenson
12. Watchmen -- Alan Moore & Dave Gibbons
13. Cryptonomicon -- Neal Stephenson
14. Consider Phlebas -- Iain M Banks
15. Stranger in a Strange Land -- Robert Heinlein
16. The Man in the High Castle -- Philip K Dick
17. American Gods -- Neil Gaiman
18. The Diamond Age -- Neal Stephenson
19. The Illuminatus! Trilogy -- Robert Shea & Robert Anton Wilson
20. Trouble with Lichen - John Wyndham

Quote of the Day

"Gerald was very sad, except it was his wedding day, so he wasn't, never mind."

- Kat, in a vain attempt to write a story without hitting the back button. I fail.

Affectionately and with Great Relief and Unecessary Capitals,
SH

A Short Analysis of Why Kat Ought Not to Ski

Whenever I go skiing, it seems that something dreadful happens/has just happened in that horridly barren and twisted and occasionally frighteningly lush amalgamation of deceit and sentimentality that I deign to call my love life. (You know, at first I was just going to say the last bit, but I'm afraid that just, "my love life," does not do this particularly nasty specimen justice.) Damn it all to hell.

I cannot check my email and I desperately need to and for some reason its not working and ohgodohgodohgod.

DAMNIT.

There is nothing to do about this torridly horrifyingly horrid horror but listen to She Want Revenge and Shakira and read slash. Slash. It saves my soul. (Actually, no, no it doesn't. Slash has actually insured that I go to HELL. I will be happy to take any one of you with me by linking you to good slash, smutty or otherwise. No charge. I take pleasure in playing Mephistopheles.

God, there's this stupid humidifier behind me and it keeps making gurgling noises and it sounds like it wants to EAT ME I SWEAR. The thing is murderous.

AUUUGH SOMEONE PLEASE TO BE EXPLAINING GIRLS TO ME KTHNXBAI.

Actually, it's not the girl who needs an explanation, it's me. PLEASE TO BE EXPLAINING KAT TO ME KTHNXBAI.

I am so very, very, very miserable and confused and aarrrgh. Don't worry, no rapey sestina angst this time, as I unfortunately find myself playing Lord Henry Wotton to someone else's Dorian Gray. (Actually, more of their Basil Hallward, but who the hell cares? Aside from Basil Hallward. EEE BASIL.)

She Wants Revenge makes it a little better. That and my Holmes/Watson novel of d00m. Actually, I lie. The Baker Street boys remind me too much of Her, She who is referred to in Capital Letters.

Why do I continue skiing if it only brings disaster upon myself and my fellows, is what I want to know.

Quote of the Day

"T-A-N-G-O. Not, I repeat, not, M-A-N-G-O. They are different things entirely."

-Dr. G-P, pointing out to me what I must admit is a valid point. Plus, I must admit that it was rather foolish of me to think that she wants Thad and I to choreograph a mango/hip-hop fusion number.

Affection and angst and anachronism and oooh, aphids and alphabets and aardvarks,
SH

Merry Christmas, Bitches!

THAT'S WHAT I SAID.

Now, for a short blogger poll -

Should Kat do something rash and foolish? I insist that you answer this question. The rash and foolish thing involves a play reading, a crush, and Marcel Proust, and I'm not telling you any more.

Quote of the Day

"A man can be happy with any woman, so long as he does not love her."
-Oscar Wilde

Comment at once if convenient, if inconvenient, comment all the same,
S.H.

Hello, Can You Hear Me Now?

Has the blog decided to work?