Identity Crisis

There is a problem. My father wants me to change my online alias. Well. Excuse me. Kat Beat, now just what is wrong with that? I'm a sorry excuse for a Phantom, changing my name every time someone like him comes along. Well, huh. But then, he controls my internet access, so eh.

The question is, what to name myself? I'm keeping Kat, (how could I not) but then there's the problem of the surname. What to name myself? See, Erik didn't have this problem? He was just Erik, and that's the end of it. In the silent movie, he was named Claudin, but then his first name was bloody Enrique and they got absolutely nothing right in that movie. Worse than Joel Schumacher, I tell you, far, far worse. Suffice it to say there were TWO Raoul type characters. I died halfway through. Repeatedly. But back to the point. I could be Claudin, I suppose. A little implausible, as I couldn't possibly be less French, but hey. As if anyone would buy that my parents actually named me Rana, which was my old alias. Plus, that one means frog in Latin, so, it got a little confusing in Latin class, as I kept turning around at inopertune times.

Valerik. I'm sure there was a random phic where Erik's last name was Valerik. Almost sure. Oh yes, LesMisLoony's "The New Production." Hey, I could be Kat Valjean! Ok, now that's just silly. Never mind. I could do some serious wishful thinking and be Kat Depp, or Kat Crawford, but then, that's just not my style. I vomit when I see those "Mrs. Kutcher" purses. So Kat Valerik is an option, most definitely. Kat Valerik. It rolls off the tongue most nicely.

Ely's last name is Baily. Yes, I know it hasn't got an E. Ely is weird that way. But it calls to mind buckets, for some indetermined reason. So I can't be Baily. Erika's last name's Imichi, I've no idea why, because she is certainly not Japanese.

Valerik. Claudin. Baily. Imichi. Or I could always make life easy and just be Kat. But would Kat do this? Are you kidding? My common sense flys out the window the minute I start typing this blog, trust me. Which is why, Max, you should not call me if I appear to be blog updating, because you will probably talk me into storming the capital or starting a socialist revolution, or something.

I think I'll be Kat Valerik for now. This'll probably change by next blog update, so keep reading!

I remain, gentleman, your faithful and obedient servant,

J.G.